Monday, September 10, 2007

A Bad Feeling

Sometimes I wonder what feels worse , Is it pain? , is it depression? , is it emptiness ?, Or is it just not knowing how you feel , I wondered a lot but what I've figured is that all of those effect you and make you a different person they change the way you feel dramatically and it effects your personality, but then I figured It will effect you only if you let it get under your skin.
For example PAIN is in fact a nervous impulse, in other words pain is something your brain has absolute control over , and that's how some people walk on fire or lie on nails it's just because they have a much higher control ( I wouldn't say absolute ) over that part of their brain than most of us do .
Long story short : You can control pain by concentrating (YOGA for example) or just letting go.
the good stuff ends here the rest is just me bitching.
I've been feeling really crappy in the last few days and the reason for that is just not knowing how I feel , who I am or what will I become , will I die today , or will I live till I'm 80 , I think I'm feeling this crappy because I'm feeling that as long as I'm living in Iraq none of my dreams will happen (I wouldn't own a lambo Gallardo or own a villa or even go out to the street and feel safe) there is just too much violence and I'm quoting Evanescence " these wounds won't seem to heal this pain is just to real there's just too much the time cannot erase"
There is just so much going on in my head I can't even think straight I feel that my brain is dealing with issues no human brain can handle -not just mine- ( Girls , School , Security, friends future , money) and nothing seems to get any better ,if i could solve some of these problems I would be able to concentrate a bit but still nothing seems to work , what I'm hoping is that all this pressure will end next June or July when I'm done with high school ( hopefully I'll get more than 96% ) in the finals - In Iraq the finals decide everything so you take one exam and your whole life depends on it (no pressure huh)- in order for me to get to med school or ..............

Saturday, September 8, 2007

The Iraqi Conspiracy Theory

When you talk to people about the situation in Iraq , you hear all kinds of opinions, all kinds of suggestions , but the opinion I hear the most is the conspiracy theory that when you talk to common people they seem to unanimously agree to it , and it states that : the United States and Israel and Iran and the surrounding Arab countries are conspiring against Iraq and they are the reason for our current situation and that Iraqis are the only good guys left in the universe (not exactly but still the same idea).
I thought about this a lot and it doesn't make any sense at all , so i tried to find out what causes people to agree to such nonsense and I found that the only reason is that people - especially Iraqis - tend to run away from responsibility and blame others for their mistakes, and I think that's what's causing us to sink deeper and deeper in this swamp , so in order for us to get out we have to admit that we are also responsible for everything that's happened , and every Iraqi should shout - I'm quoting Akon - " You can put the blame on me ".
by the way I'm not denying that Iran & Arabs and even the US should take some of the blame.
What I think is that Iraqis need to wake up, and realize that if they won't do something to change their current situation , No one will change it for them, neither the US nor Iran nor Arabs , All of those guys act based on their own interests , What they need to realize is that this world isn't based on love or hatred neither it is based on good and evil ,In fact this world is based upon interests and benefits , the United States has interests in Iraq and so does Iran and all the Arabs And none of them gives a damn about the Iraqis , But what I believe is causing the chaos within our country is us the Iraqis and we have to stop killing , robbing , kidnapping and blowing up each other , We have to realize that we all have one thing in common we are all Iraqis and we should all help heal this country's wounds so one day , maybe just maybe our children will be proud of being Iraqis .

Monday, September 3, 2007

Hey First Time

I'm from Iraq , I'm 17 , And I started blogging out of boredom and then i discovered it's a way of letting out your emotions and feelings and expressing whats within you and knowing honestly what people think of your ideas,
Your opinion is important to me . thank you for your time